Lessons Learned in the Trenches: Part 3

If you are just joining us, here are the first two posts in this series:
Lessons Learned in the Trenches: Part 1
Lessons Learned in the Trenches: Part 2

3. Embrace your "Normal," whatever that may be.

Last spring I joined a Bible Study lead by my pastor's wife. God has since called them to another ministry, but I am so thankful that God used Ms. Lynette to speak truth into my life during the final months of the dissertation. Lesson #3 is one I learned from her.

I can hear Ms. Lynette's voice, quite clearly in my mind, "We've got to learn to live in our 'New Normal,' whatever that is! Sometimes we've just got to be big girls, quit whinin', and just do it!" (That, by the way, is a loose quotation. :) )


I confess, this was often precisely what I needed to hear. By the end of our PhD process I often did not feel like continuing to do the right thing, and even more often I struggled to think and believe the right thing. Too often I was "whinin'" in my heart, if not outloud. Of course, it wasn't a "New Normal" I was struggling with, but the old "Normal," which, in my mind was getting...well, old.

Looking back I can see a marked difference between the times I made wise choices despite my feelings (aka: embracing my "Normal") and the times I acted out of emotion (aka: discontentment with my "Normal"). Choosing to wash dishes, do laundry, make beds, bathe children, cook, and clean up messes, despite exhaustion and the overwhelming temptation to sit at my computer in my pajamas all day, often lifted my spirits and renewed my energy. Giving into the temptation to neglect my responsibilities, however, lead to despondency, further exhaustion, and a greater struggle with sins such as anger, impatience, and selfishness.

Not surprisingly, this observation mirrors a biblical principle:

"Each one should test their own actions...for each one should carry their own load.... Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Galatians 6:4-9

God tells us we should test ourselves to see if our actions measure up to the responsibilities He has given us. Our actions are the seeds we sow. If we act to please ourselves God plainly tells us we will reap destruction. Applications of this include spiritual consequences (such as defeat in struggles with sin, a sense of separation from God), emotional consequences (such as depression, fear, guilt, shame, anxiety, anger), practical consequences (such as problems in relationships, losses, fruitless efforts), and even physical consequences (such as sleeplessness, lack of energy, stomach issues). If, however, we act to please the Spirit, we will reap the freedom of living life as God intended.

God gives each of us different sets of circumstances for different seasons of our lives. We aren't always going to feel happy or fulfilled in what He has called us to for any given season. But, as Ms. Lynette so clearly impressed on me, embracing "Normal" means we have to keep doing the right thing, even when we don't feel like it, trusting that the emotion will eventually follow.